Post by Berwyn Rhodes on Oct 12, 2020 5:23:11 GMT -5
As Bianca's anger started to visibly burn brighter, Berwyn mentally awaited either two responses. Well, she expected only one response from Bianca, honestly. The Giantess had told this story enough times in therapy to know the common reply to her tale. The other answer she prepared for was what she would say against herself. What she thought about her own action, and secretly wished that someone else had the same opinion about her actions.
When her friend said that she needed to hear something unexpected, Berwyn got perhaps a bit more hopeful. Her fleeting desire was short-lived.
Berwyn waited quietly for Bianca to finish. To be fair, Bianca was more fair and balanced than expected. She acknowledged that Berwyn would have been physically able to stop anything that was happening. That was more than some acknowledged without Berwyn needing to point that out. Perhaps because Bianca was a huntress-in-training like herself. She knew what power we had. The same power we used earlier today to fight off a group of armed robbers like it was nothing. Without even getting hurt, while wounding their 'attackers' like they were made of paper. Still, even after pointing out the imbalance in power, Bianca seemed to still regard Berwyn as the overall victim in the relationship.
There was a burning need to correct her.
But there was even an even greater fear to not speak up.
Bianca said that she was disgusted, yes, she said disgusted by someone exploiting a weakness to gain something. Berwyn looked sullen after hearing those words. In her mind, whatever had happened with Okropir was not a simple case of victim/abuser. Had she not initiated everything? Was she not the person who pushed things further? Was she not the person who insisted that they kept things secret?
In not wanting to paint her former doctor as the villain in her telling, Berwyn had let out her own behaviour. Perhaps she did so unconsciously. Not wanting Bianca to think less of her. She wanted to correct that view in Bianca's mind. Wanted to speak up and try to give her all of the facts she deserved to get a clear picture of the situation. She deeply wanted to be honest.
But even more so she was afraid.
So in the end, she didn't say anything about it. Berwyn just quietly listened to Bianca. Showing her colours more by staying silent as Bianca took a side. To condemn the person that Berwyn didn't saw as the perpetrator in it all.
Besides, Berwyn needed to perhaps even more so defend her words when the other topic was brought up by Bianca. While looking again at her roommate, Berwyn spoke up for the first time again when Bianca asked shyly if she loved her. Berwyn blushed softly at that, though with her pale skin it was more than obvious. She thought about making it into a joke, but that was honestly not how she felt. "I...I think so..." Was what Berwyn responded to the question, not certain how all of this would proceed.
Bianca's response was...weird. Had she not come onto her? Had she not toyed with her before now? Making comments and just moments ago touched her arm like a lover? What the hell was this lady on about? What kind of commitment was she expecting like this was the most dangerous thing in the world?
Did someone hurt Bianca? Did someone hurt Bianca who had said they loved her? Okropir didn't say much about love, or that he loved her. Not in a way that Berwyn knew was honest or healthy, at least. Not the kind of love that you read about in romance novels or movies. It was physical love. A need to be close and do what your body wanted. For Berwyn even more so. It was quite honestly the only kind of love she ever experienced. A need. She couldn't exactly build a life together with her secret romance. He was twice her age and married. Berwyn was using him to get her fix and was ready to use everything she had to get what she wanted. Force and love proved enough in the past.
But Bianca was not Akropir.
Berwyn didn't use Bianca to get drugs. She didn't need to bend and break her arm to be persuaded and didn't need to be enticed with other pleasures. Berwyn was quite certain that she couldn't even do the things she did in the past. She did all of that because her body craved an unhealthy stimulant. A desire that, while perhaps not wholly banished from her mind, was not even close to being in the driving seat.
That made Berwyn uncertain. She had said she loved Bianca, she felt something for her, but in this situation, Berwyn knew not fully what it meant. Unexplored territory.
When Bianca asked why Berwyn loved Bianca, and immediately following that up with saying that she didn't love her, she felt...cheated out of an answer. She wasn't mad, but she also didn't seem happy after Bianca had said that line. She seemed to want for Berwyn to explain what she meant with her words but immediately followed that up with a rejection. Berwyn didn't ask her question because of that. She would give Bianca all the time she needed to explain how she felt. Perhaps partly out of spite, but also to make sure that Berwyn didn't misunderstand what Bianca meant.
She indicated that she listened with nods and hums, but Bianca said everything she just said without the big friendly giantess interrupting. It was honestly...kind of pathetic. No, more so cute than pathetic. Berwyn smiled softly at seeing her friend freak out. Maybe it wasn't nice, but she couldn't help herself Seeing how much Bianca seemed to flail about. Despite seeming to be a way more carefree person in almost every regard, the Faunus seemed to be hopelessly complicated about what she wanted out of a relationship after someone said the 'L'-word.
For Berwyn, it was always something physical in the past. For Bianca, it seemed to be a whole lot more.
Only after Bianca said that she didn't know if she wanted to return her feelings, did Berwyn finally gave a reply that was more than a simple nod or hum. Berwyn leaned forward again, wanting to plant another kiss on Bianca's lips. Smaller and quicker now, more to get a point across than anything else. If she was denied this, Berwyn would simply smile as her intent was at least clear.
"You talk too much for a girl who is supposed to live in the moment, you know..." Berwyn smiled after she spoke. Weirdly enough, seeing how much Bianca had freaked out had...calmed her somewhat. Made Berwyn feel at least more in control. To know that Bianca was perhaps even more hopelessly confused about this as she was.
"Here, you have me lying beside you. You teased me throughout the day, I responded to it. You stroked my arm and went in for the kill. I kissed you, and I freaked out. I am sorry for that. It happened, even if I didn't mean it. Then, I said that I loved you. Next, you seem to reject me like I just proposed to marry you. I don't know if we are just both too broken to have this conversation any other way, so I will make this very, very clear to you. Keep laying still for a moment, please."
Berwyn attempted to roll over in the grass towards Bianca. As she did so, she activated her aura to hover just above Bianca in the air. When she completed her spin and found herself face to face with Bianca, it was honestly a weird sight. This massive woman was suspended just above the Faunus. If she were to deactivate her semblance, she would crash down on Bianca. Despite the intimacy of this all, Berwyn made sure to hover high enough not to touch. Her white hair glowed softly, illuminating her already pale features.
Berwyn found that feeling was more so expressed by your body than by your words.
"I care about you. You know that. I want to see you happy. I want to have a fun day with you now, I want to have a fun week with you, and I want to have fun with you for as long as we are students. After that, who knows what happens."
If Bianca was still underneath the floating balloon of sexual tension, Berwyn would have brought her finger down towards the Faunus' arm to follow the curves of it. Sure, Bianca was not nearly as muscled as the Huntress hovering above her, but there was still something to return the favour.
"I also think that I am physically attracted to you. I want to explore every curve and...every nook and cranny...of this body at least once. I guess that is what love means to me, to answer your previous question. I never did this before...like this...with a girl...so I don't know how this will turn out. I think you got more...experience...with knowing if you like such things than I."
And now came the hard part...
"But if you are...expecting more than that...want more from me...I don't know if I can give that to you. I said I loved you, yes. For me that is mostly physical. All that other stuff, I am not so certain about that. I am not showing you to my mom, if that is what you meant. So, I will make this easy."
Berwyn spun around in the air, hoping that Bianca was still beneath her when she completed her rotation.
"If you still want to kiss me, do it. I will float down and we will see how we enjoy ourselves. If we don't like it, this will just be our little secret in the woods..." Berwyn's blush intensified for a moment. "If we do enjoy it...well...we already share a room together~"
The big friendly giantess was not one for subtlety as she laid all her cards on the table. She wanted this now. Her body wanted this now. To touch, to love, to hold. Her own words had at least convinced herself of that.
1711 words;10037 Total
When her friend said that she needed to hear something unexpected, Berwyn got perhaps a bit more hopeful. Her fleeting desire was short-lived.
Berwyn waited quietly for Bianca to finish. To be fair, Bianca was more fair and balanced than expected. She acknowledged that Berwyn would have been physically able to stop anything that was happening. That was more than some acknowledged without Berwyn needing to point that out. Perhaps because Bianca was a huntress-in-training like herself. She knew what power we had. The same power we used earlier today to fight off a group of armed robbers like it was nothing. Without even getting hurt, while wounding their 'attackers' like they were made of paper. Still, even after pointing out the imbalance in power, Bianca seemed to still regard Berwyn as the overall victim in the relationship.
There was a burning need to correct her.
But there was even an even greater fear to not speak up.
Bianca said that she was disgusted, yes, she said disgusted by someone exploiting a weakness to gain something. Berwyn looked sullen after hearing those words. In her mind, whatever had happened with Okropir was not a simple case of victim/abuser. Had she not initiated everything? Was she not the person who pushed things further? Was she not the person who insisted that they kept things secret?
In not wanting to paint her former doctor as the villain in her telling, Berwyn had let out her own behaviour. Perhaps she did so unconsciously. Not wanting Bianca to think less of her. She wanted to correct that view in Bianca's mind. Wanted to speak up and try to give her all of the facts she deserved to get a clear picture of the situation. She deeply wanted to be honest.
But even more so she was afraid.
So in the end, she didn't say anything about it. Berwyn just quietly listened to Bianca. Showing her colours more by staying silent as Bianca took a side. To condemn the person that Berwyn didn't saw as the perpetrator in it all.
Besides, Berwyn needed to perhaps even more so defend her words when the other topic was brought up by Bianca. While looking again at her roommate, Berwyn spoke up for the first time again when Bianca asked shyly if she loved her. Berwyn blushed softly at that, though with her pale skin it was more than obvious. She thought about making it into a joke, but that was honestly not how she felt. "I...I think so..." Was what Berwyn responded to the question, not certain how all of this would proceed.
Bianca's response was...weird. Had she not come onto her? Had she not toyed with her before now? Making comments and just moments ago touched her arm like a lover? What the hell was this lady on about? What kind of commitment was she expecting like this was the most dangerous thing in the world?
Did someone hurt Bianca? Did someone hurt Bianca who had said they loved her? Okropir didn't say much about love, or that he loved her. Not in a way that Berwyn knew was honest or healthy, at least. Not the kind of love that you read about in romance novels or movies. It was physical love. A need to be close and do what your body wanted. For Berwyn even more so. It was quite honestly the only kind of love she ever experienced. A need. She couldn't exactly build a life together with her secret romance. He was twice her age and married. Berwyn was using him to get her fix and was ready to use everything she had to get what she wanted. Force and love proved enough in the past.
But Bianca was not Akropir.
Berwyn didn't use Bianca to get drugs. She didn't need to bend and break her arm to be persuaded and didn't need to be enticed with other pleasures. Berwyn was quite certain that she couldn't even do the things she did in the past. She did all of that because her body craved an unhealthy stimulant. A desire that, while perhaps not wholly banished from her mind, was not even close to being in the driving seat.
That made Berwyn uncertain. She had said she loved Bianca, she felt something for her, but in this situation, Berwyn knew not fully what it meant. Unexplored territory.
When Bianca asked why Berwyn loved Bianca, and immediately following that up with saying that she didn't love her, she felt...cheated out of an answer. She wasn't mad, but she also didn't seem happy after Bianca had said that line. She seemed to want for Berwyn to explain what she meant with her words but immediately followed that up with a rejection. Berwyn didn't ask her question because of that. She would give Bianca all the time she needed to explain how she felt. Perhaps partly out of spite, but also to make sure that Berwyn didn't misunderstand what Bianca meant.
She indicated that she listened with nods and hums, but Bianca said everything she just said without the big friendly giantess interrupting. It was honestly...kind of pathetic. No, more so cute than pathetic. Berwyn smiled softly at seeing her friend freak out. Maybe it wasn't nice, but she couldn't help herself Seeing how much Bianca seemed to flail about. Despite seeming to be a way more carefree person in almost every regard, the Faunus seemed to be hopelessly complicated about what she wanted out of a relationship after someone said the 'L'-word.
For Berwyn, it was always something physical in the past. For Bianca, it seemed to be a whole lot more.
Only after Bianca said that she didn't know if she wanted to return her feelings, did Berwyn finally gave a reply that was more than a simple nod or hum. Berwyn leaned forward again, wanting to plant another kiss on Bianca's lips. Smaller and quicker now, more to get a point across than anything else. If she was denied this, Berwyn would simply smile as her intent was at least clear.
"You talk too much for a girl who is supposed to live in the moment, you know..." Berwyn smiled after she spoke. Weirdly enough, seeing how much Bianca had freaked out had...calmed her somewhat. Made Berwyn feel at least more in control. To know that Bianca was perhaps even more hopelessly confused about this as she was.
"Here, you have me lying beside you. You teased me throughout the day, I responded to it. You stroked my arm and went in for the kill. I kissed you, and I freaked out. I am sorry for that. It happened, even if I didn't mean it. Then, I said that I loved you. Next, you seem to reject me like I just proposed to marry you. I don't know if we are just both too broken to have this conversation any other way, so I will make this very, very clear to you. Keep laying still for a moment, please."
Berwyn attempted to roll over in the grass towards Bianca. As she did so, she activated her aura to hover just above Bianca in the air. When she completed her spin and found herself face to face with Bianca, it was honestly a weird sight. This massive woman was suspended just above the Faunus. If she were to deactivate her semblance, she would crash down on Bianca. Despite the intimacy of this all, Berwyn made sure to hover high enough not to touch. Her white hair glowed softly, illuminating her already pale features.
Berwyn found that feeling was more so expressed by your body than by your words.
"I care about you. You know that. I want to see you happy. I want to have a fun day with you now, I want to have a fun week with you, and I want to have fun with you for as long as we are students. After that, who knows what happens."
If Bianca was still underneath the floating balloon of sexual tension, Berwyn would have brought her finger down towards the Faunus' arm to follow the curves of it. Sure, Bianca was not nearly as muscled as the Huntress hovering above her, but there was still something to return the favour.
"I also think that I am physically attracted to you. I want to explore every curve and...every nook and cranny...of this body at least once. I guess that is what love means to me, to answer your previous question. I never did this before...like this...with a girl...so I don't know how this will turn out. I think you got more...experience...with knowing if you like such things than I."
And now came the hard part...
"But if you are...expecting more than that...want more from me...I don't know if I can give that to you. I said I loved you, yes. For me that is mostly physical. All that other stuff, I am not so certain about that. I am not showing you to my mom, if that is what you meant. So, I will make this easy."
Berwyn spun around in the air, hoping that Bianca was still beneath her when she completed her rotation.
"If you still want to kiss me, do it. I will float down and we will see how we enjoy ourselves. If we don't like it, this will just be our little secret in the woods..." Berwyn's blush intensified for a moment. "If we do enjoy it...well...we already share a room together~"
The big friendly giantess was not one for subtlety as she laid all her cards on the table. She wanted this now. Her body wanted this now. To touch, to love, to hold. Her own words had at least convinced herself of that.
1711 words;10037 Total